A HOMILY FOR THE AFTERFEAST OF THE NATIVITY OF THE MOST HOLY THEOTOKOS
About the Lessons the Feast Teaches Parents and Children
Brothers and sisters!
Yesterday we celebrated the great feast of the Nativity of the Immaculate Mother of God, but many of you could not be present, either because of distance or because you were at work; therefore, since we are still in the post-festal period, I would like to share a few thoughts relating to the feast.
The Nativity of the Theotokos, as we chant in the Dismissal Troparion, “hath proclaimed joy to the whole world,” because from the all-blessed Virgin shone “the Sun of Righteousness, Christ our God, annulling the curse, bestowing the blessing, abolishing death, and granting us life everlasting.” The Most Holy Trinity determined before the ages that the maiden Mariam would serve as the Mother of the Son of God. For the Theotokos to be prepared for this, it was necessary that she be born of righteous parents, sure to rear her from infancy in the law of the Lord and the way of holiness. Her father and mother, Saints Joachim and Anna, were the most pious couple not only of their times, but of all the ages. This was only fitting, since from their loins sprang a daughter whose holiness surpasses that of the cherubim and who is “beyond compare more glorious than the seraphim.”
Anyone familiar with the Lives of the saints knows that God-fearing children are generally the offspring of devout parents. Joachim and Anna and the Virgin Mary are the supreme examples of this truth, but lesser instances may be multiplied almost endlessly. Thus we read in the Life of Saint Demetrius of Rostov: “His parents were of noble origin, deeply faithful, and adorned with Christian virtues.” Similarly, in the Life of Saint Nicholas, it is written: “Nicholas’ father was named Theophanes and his mother Nonna. Dwelling together in lawful wedlock, they were adorned with every virtue. Because of their God-pleasing way of life, numerous good deeds, and especially their unstinting almsgiving, they, as holy roots, were deemed worthy to put forth a holy shoot, their blessed child.” The divine Gospel itself testifies regarding Zacharias and Elisabeth, the parents of the Forerunner, that they were both righteous before God, walking in all the commandments of the Lord blameless.[1]
Truly devout parents are inevitably zealous in rearing their children in piety, because they desire nothing so much for their children as to see them pleasing God, advancing in true devotion, and saving their souls. Thus Saint Demetrius of Rostov informs us in the Life of Saints Joachim and Anna that “as the Virgin Mary grew, her parents cared for her as the apple of their eye, having learned by God’s revelation that she was to become a light to the whole world and the renewal of human nature. They reared her with the circumspection befitting the one who was to become the Mother of our Saviour.” Pious parents begin the good upbringing of their children while they are still in the womb. Mother and father dedicate themselves during this period to prayer and abstinence, begging God to shine upon their offspring the spiritual light which is far more brilliant than the light of day. As soon as their child comes forth, they summon the priest to read the appropriate prayers, and do the same on the eighth day; and on the fortieth day the mother appears in the Lord’s temple to be cleansed and to present her child as an offering to God. The parents choose godparents who will assist eagerly in the spiritual nurture of the child, and they foster this involvement. They unfailingly bring their children to church for vigils, feasts, and Sunday services; see that they commune at every Liturgy; and assiduously teach them at home by word and example, formally and informally. They protect them as much as possible from the evil influence of the world, curtailing or altogether forbidding them access to the computer or computerized devices, television, bad films and books, soul-destroying music, and disorderly friends. They read them spiritual literature and say prayers morning and evening with them. When their children reach the teen years with their increased temptations, confused emotions, intellectual pride, and raging passions, they continue to admonish them wisely, even when the children are sullen, non-compliant, or defiant. For this, parents frequently are repaid in the short run by increased bitterness or argumentativeness; but later they often see the fruit of their labors: the young person matures a little and begins to understand the vanity of this world, acquiring something of the wisdom of years. Most important of all, the parents strive to provide a living example of love for God and continue to love their children, despite the rebellious spirit of the latter. Many children who in their immaturity test their parents’ patience to the utmost, almost robbing them of hope, eventually come to understand this parental love for God and for them, and by it, and by their parents’ prayers, are transformed completely.
If fathers and mothers have in Saints Joachim and Anna and the other parents of saints the best models for child-rearing, as well as for their own general conduct, then young people have in the Theotokos – who was only about sixteen years old when she gave birth to God Incarnate – and in the other saints the best inspiration possible for their orientation and behavior. Take, for example, Saint Luke of Hellas, the founder of Hosios Lukas, the most splendid medieval monastery in Greece. This is how his childhood and youth are described in his Life:
“From an early age the blessed Luke shunned childish games and pastimes. He had no immature traits whatsoever. Although still a boy, he proved himself a perfect man. He loved silence and solitude, and was meek, humble, and modest. His fasting was remarkable: he abstained not only from meat, but from milk, cheese, and eggs, and from apples and other fruits, usually the favorite treats of children. But what is most astonishing is that Luke had no guide or instructor in asceticism, except for the grace of God, which daily incited him to greater struggles. The young saint loved fasting, labor, poverty, and everything that mortifies the flesh. Whatever others considered sweet, joyful, and pleasant, the blessed one regarded as bitter, hateful, and onerous. What others felt to be grievous, oppressive, and burdensome, Luke deemed agreeable, welcome, and desirable.
“Thinking that their son’s austere habits were the result, not of virtue, but of childish fancy, Luke’s parents decided to test him. They stewed meat and fish in the same pot, then served him the fish. No sooner had the blessed one tasted the fish than he realized it had been cooked with meat. Terribly upset, he vomited the food. Weeping and mourning, as though he had committed some terrible iniquity, he refused even to touch bread. For three days he remained without eating, lamenting all the while. This convinced the parents of the boy’s resolve, and thenceforth they permitted him to live according to his own pious inclinations. Otherwise, Luke was obedient to his parents in everything, carrying out all their wishes without any delay. He tended the sheep, and when he was old enough, began tilling the fields. Eager to mortify his young flesh and the passions, he shunned no task in the home or on the farm. So merciful was he to the poor, that for their sake he repeatedly deprived himself of necessities. Whenever he left the house on some errand, he would give to the needy the food he had taken with him and himself go hungry. Sometimes he would even distribute his clothes to them and return home naked. For this his parents would scold, upbraid, or beat him. On several occasions they refused to provide him anything else to wear, and Luke remained without clothes for long periods of time. These measures could not put an end to the saint’s deeds of mercy, because the virtuous youth was not ashamed of nakedness or afraid of thrashings. Nakedness for the poor was to him a robe of imperial purple; blows and dishonor suffered on their behalf were to him glory and honor, incitement to do more to help them.
“One day the blessed one was on his way to sow wheat and encountered several paupers. He gave them most of the grain. As a result he had no choice but to sow the family’s field very lightly. However, the Lord blessed the seed so that it produced a hundredfold: never before had the land given such a crop.
“After his father fell ill and died, the blessed Luke abandoned farming and devoted himself to prayer, meditation on God, and the study of holy books. So high did the youth’s mind soar, that he was at times bodily elevated, as his mother witnessed. Curious about what Luke was doing when he secluded himself for so long in his room, she peered through a crack in the door and saw him praying. The saint’s mind was on high with the Lord, and his body had followed it upwards. Saint Luke was standing in the air, a foot and a half above the floor. This his mother beheld thrice. It filled her with awe, and afterwards she swore to the truth of it.”
Devout parents are overjoyed to have a child, who, like Saint Luke, is on fire with zeal for God. Nothing else brings them such profound satisfaction and fulfillment, such reward for their struggles and sacrifices on behalf of their offspring. Disobedient, defiant, disorderly children, on the other hand, will have to answer for the grief they cause their pious parents. They are justly called “parricides” – “parent-murderers” – because by their lack of love and fervor for God, and by their errant ways, they drive a knife into the hearts of the father and mother who bore them and did everything possible to instill in them fear of the Lord. In this connection, now hear this story, from the Life of Saint Parthenius of Lampsacus:
“A priest’s son, Nicon by name, was being tortured at the hands of a fierce devil. Casting the youth before the saint’s feet, his parents begged the man of God to have mercy and drive out the unclean spirit. Parthenius announced, ‘Your son is unworthy to be healed. He is a parricide: that is why the demon has been given power to torment him. He has insulted and offended you, and in your distress you prayed the Lord to chastise him. Let him be: this is deserved punishment, and is to his benefit.’
“Despite this explanation, the parents, moved by love, wept and continued to implore God’s hierarch, ‘Entreat the Lord to deliver our child from the cruel devil!’ Stirred by the parents’ tears, the blessed one fervently prayed to God, and the demon quickly departed. The father and mother, praising and blessing the Lord, took home their son entirely healed.”
And so, fathers and mothers, having the example of Saints Joachim and Anna and the other parents of saints before your eyes, strive to be a light to your children, so that they may inherit not just your temporal possessions, but your faith and piety. Teach them the law of God, and kindle in them the flame of love for their Creator and Saviour. Shelter them from the evil of this world and from bad companions as much as possible; and do not hesitate to correct them wisely when they go astray. And you, young people, keep ever before your spiritual eyes the example of our immaculate Lady, the Theotokos and Ever-Virgin Mary, and of the other saints who lived in a most godly manner from their earliest years, that you may please Christ and your pious parents, rewarding them with joy for all the blessings they have showered upon you, and winning for yourselves imperishable blessings in the everlasting kingdom. Amen.
[1] Luke 1:6
